may ocho

Today was a shame from the gate
And I prayed that it raised face
From feelings of hate to distrust
Which are the same in a way
Not that I think you care

When the world is filled with warfare
nuclear missiles in the air

there's hardly oxygen to spare
With volcanic ash everywhere
today's a day I just don't care
If I have stains on my outerwear
And she by whom I'm impaired
Is nowhere to share my despairs

This love has taken it's toll on me
I've said goodbye too many times before
Ive seen her heart break in front of me
Which is why I won't say goodbye anymore
I feel lost for direction
Like my hearts under compression
It doesn't matter my selection
I'm cursed to be left again
or will I be decapped 
Like an expendable man

Somewhere between
Reality and dreams
There's a surreal scene
Featuring my jillybean
She's weighing out green
To sling to some geek

And yes I'm a new dork
But he's not like me

I see an open door
and im searching my complex
Trying to find the love
It's sparked my interest
What happened next?
Well then I took a test
I failed I got an 'f'
So now I get no sex
Only those with cash
In hand get ass
Doesn't matter how you act
It's a damn fact
I'm waking up reeling
With this new feeling
That what was once silly
Could really kill me

May 6 hopeless

I've been here before
The state of misery
There's no map out
And my guide is gone
Took me here left me alone
To find my way home
She ripped my heart once sewn
With the finest string
The other thing...
I just can't seem to bring
Myself to swallow the drink
Called truth because it stings
I thought i was the king
But really I am nothing
Really My hearts crushed
I yell and cuss but
No don't look back
The skin grafts aren't so bad
Now my hearts patched
And my life is enhanced
You can fool that man
I take pity as often as I can
Looking back I see a gap
The size of April in my past

Cinco De Mayo

Through the brightness of day.
and the darkness of night.
Everyday i think in fright .
What if we had lost the fight.
We wouldn't have our rights.
we won the battle but lost the war.
but the battle started more.
the odds where four to one.
but we still won.


so now we celebrate
this independence day
on the fifth of May
when Mexico overcame


I got my cup raised
Margaritas are my fave
on de Cinco de May
do I really have to explain?

the salt on the vase
as I grip the frozen base
embrace and tilt back
as I enjoy the lime drank
and you should do the same
but thats all I've got to say
I'm bout to hit the hay
so g'day

I skipped the third...sorry

So far to go
despite where we came
from a desperate vein
of those who discriminate
I thought we've changed
to base more than face,
sex, age, or race
as personality traits


but thats my mistake?
arent we one and the same?
bi, straight, or gay?
some cant quite just say
and that's what I find strange
we preach peace in faith
then wage war in it's name
which seems knave


But I'll rant and I'll rave
but nothing has gave
at work sex is the base
for getting a raise
and if you've been in my place
personal space invaded
saying you cant be someway
in the home of the free and the brave

The Sequel To May 1st (May 2)

The sequel to May 1st


Wanna watch the Boondocks?
thats whats on but gotta stop

Before Times Square is bombed
everyone waits in awe and shock

but something else is the cause
of stress like acid rain drops

so I take a second to pause
to let Mary Jane sing a song

slow my roll for control
and a seven is thrown
but the sharks of lifes loans
wont let the money go
and on the down low
theyre jealous cuz they know
I dont need their cash flow
so I'm a lifted soul

the dude on the news
forecasts sunny and cool
but at least my altitudes mood
proves this to be far from true


I remember days of my youth
Sacramento sunny and cool
at ninety-two by the pool
like a Nashville May flood of new

May day 2010

Leaders of every race and age
Join to praise His holy name

Asking that this may day
Won't be like when it originated
The haymarket streets
With police and angry employees
Is a sad and desolate scene
Worth praying for I think

Meanwhile readers are filled with glee
Getting comic books for free
Got some x-men with wolverine
Making meat of his enemies
What a contrast between
Things for the days theme
But neither apply to me
As I'm working to pay lifes fees

Why's it gotta be so hard to reach
For the stars why are they so far
 
Like an unmanned oil sub coming apart
I can't see through the muddy dark

I dream of my songs on the radio
But country drones are the overtone
Tim McGraw singing something slow
It's his birthday today too ya know

March 29 2010

woe is me
for I prayed defeat
of our nations enemies
but we may fight eternally
Obama is the shepherd
I thought I wanted
He told me that change
would be awesome
change may be the answer
but not his
He restored my faith
in the Republicans
Yea, though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of the bread line,
I shall fear no hunger,
for his bailouts are mine
He has anointed my income
with charges and fines
My expenses runneth over
like wine from the vines
now surely I will pay
the price for my life
And I will live and die
in a mortgaged home

March 2010 - Table of Contents

March 1 2010
March 2 2010
March 3 2010
March 4 2010
March 5 2010
March 6 2010
March 7 2010
March 8 2010
March 9 2010
March 10 2010
March 11 2010
March 12 2010
March 13 2010
March 14 2010
March 15 2010
March 16 2010
March 17 2010
March 18 2010
March 19 2010
March 20 2010
March 21 2010
March 22 2010
March 23 2010
March 24 2010
March 25 2010
March 26 2010
March 27 2010
March 28 2010





Downloads for songs this month -
Gotta Alone
No Way Out
Yours Exclusive
Save My Soul

March 28 2010

Sometimes we just need
to escape for relief
tel your worries peace
embrace a change of scene
such was our choice
My Jillibean would join
me in our Spokane convoy
to enjoy getting away, her voice
sounds annoyed as we drive
two hundred miles til we arrive
at a zoo with only big cats inside
but our visit was concise
we circled the grounds twice
and witnessed a tiger vomit
I don't know what was its problem
but the sight was quite awesome
famished from the ride
we over satisfy our appetite
Old Country Buffet is what defines
our paradigms as we dine
and delight is in my mind
I'm starting to unwind
from the nice time.
Just Jillybean and I

March 27 2010

Exhausted from a full day
tommorow is for fools play
no work at all that day!
so I'd take some sleeping aid
hit the hay and when I'd wake
we're on the road before eight
before we even ate!
Jilly and I appreciate
how so early looks like late,
the road my lifeline
I close my eyes in the ride
since Jilly agreed to drive
I woke up on the roadside
I could see the car nearby
dried blood stained the lane
as my face throbbed in pain
my heart paced as I approached
the upturned coach on the road
and what I would behold
that my soul was in control
of the vehicle that had rolled
as I abrubtly awoke

March 26 2010

choo choo
here comes the train into my view
and who but you comes walking through
the room into my heart
ooh ooh
you look so cute that you abuse
that God refused to exclude
the most minute beauties your a work of art
I want to be
everything for you
not number three or two
wanna be the king you choose
I would die in my sleep
just to dream of you
Im not complete its true
would you make me full
You won me over
Like table tennis or pong
You won me over
Like Sonic or Donkey Kong
You won me over
Id never do you wrong
You won me over
thats why Im singing this song

March 25 2010

Download Yours Exclusive Mp3 Here



It's just me and you miss
we can do this
lets never say screw it
make our love exclusive
Ill be the soldier
you be the owner of my heart
I'll be the donor
I want to be closer to your heart
dont you want none of this
little miss? I insist
I could buy you gold or silver bracelets
but all you wants a kiss
all you wants a man
not a dick or a kid
you dont want none of that
all you wants a kiss
from the east to the west
Im gonna have to confess
a man would be hard pressed
to find a similar princess
you hold my upmost interest
what I can buy is limitless
the only difference
is that all you wants a kiss


Download Yours Exclusive Mp3 Here

March 24 2010

Download Save My Soul mp3 here!



Ive come to accept it
I guess I must confess it
the reason Im successless
is because Im so reckless
the world has left me breathless
so I gave her a diamond necklace
she misunderstood the message
and the world left me desperate
just a fading enigma
eyes reddened like with stigmas
on the horizon is a figure
of speech called a grave digger
thats when you know youre in the hole
but instead of catching hold
you just dig deeper below
til youre as low as you can go
and no bottle or any pill
could help the way I feel
peering out the windowseal
confused at how to chill
all that time that I spent
the time that was meant
to mean something didn't
Im crawling outof my skin


Download Save My Soul mp3 here!

March 23 2010

Tell me I need to know
though the answer might dispose
of my soul like compost it
what I just gotta know is
where are all the good girls goin?
I thought they were here for the show
but I suppose no as they walk out the door
cant take it no more, whats all this for?
girls are grindin on girls
in this mind bending world
they get sick with the pulse
its too much to hold in my skull
I blow my load
my brains all over the floor
this is outta control
and these girls just dance some more
theres xs on her hands
that means shes here to dance
or find a chance at some romance
you can tell when the booty claps
dayum that the girl is bad
queen of the damned for man after man
not a chance I would stand
its sad but a fact

March 22 2010

"Sir, I really don't car"
He said with a blank stare
"It sounds awesome to be fair
but your tale will not repair
or somehow pay your late fee
for Dante's Inferno on 360
sir I understand you may hate me
but you can't rent 'til you pay me"
So I will go to Hastings
I turned and left not even waving
cuz Hollywood is hating
charging fake fees and changing schemes
the plan which I concede
is too good to believe
is how I actually percieved it
before I was decieved
but I win in the end
'cause I'd rent what I wanted
and Hollywood
they went out of business

:)

March 21 2010

Sunday? Why Sunday?
for alliterations sake
shouldn't it be Monday?
but today is such a fun day!
No one works on Sunday
except for Eric so double yay!
much the opposite Monday
so sip iced lime drank
with a barbie in the yard
Mike's cooking burgers charred
throwing a frisbee in the park
my recipe is an art
two pints lime mix
tequila and a shot of gin
with salt on the rim?
the beginning of the end
from a one to a ten
on a scale of drunkenness
can't stand I'm stumblin'
words fumblin' and stutterin'
everyone was surprised
by the white guy
who knew how to grind
tequila and lime and ice

March 20 2010

As the epic conclusion
reaches it's resolution
the chains of retribution
cast me to putrid doom
"Not yet it's too soon!"
I beg and I croon
but the stones closed my tomb
and there's no room to move
Game Over is on the screen
it's Mike, Maxsim, and me
and victory was the tease
on the Xbox 360, degrees
of Dante's Inferno the game
though the original tale was slain
it was quite an enjoyable play
until I died that is to say
under which thought I strain
my brain in order to explain
how can someone die
whose already in the grave?
at which thought I gave
I guess I'm gonna have to train
that's what I got to say
Dante's Inferno's what's #nowplaying

March 19 2010

there's something holding me back
from my planned life track
I was reminded after the fact
that I signed a soul contract
enforcing me to enact
according to Lucifers demands
unless through me he's damned
otherwise I'm simply trapped
Then a chill swept through the mammoth crowd
as a sordid, vulgar, repulsive essence was felt.
Arrogantly prancing, draped in a sparkling shroud
Trolled by demons, Satan ascended from Hell
with no words his course expressed
I had met my lifes true test
angels and demons attend
with God himself as the ref
The bell, the crowd, the fight was on,
with the devil kicking up dust
With all his evil tricks he came undone
He threw his jabs of hate and lust
three or four pierced my gut
at that moment I knew what pain was
felt both pain and disgust
as Heaven faded from my touch

March 18 2010

the gates of the saints
'aint in the straightaway
I just passed cloud eight
above the plane of the soundscape
and I arrive on cloud nine
right on time to dine
on the cuisine for mine eyes
every moment I'm surprised
by a new prize of sorts
on my cloud concourse
my mind immediately divorced
from any form of scorn
in this cerabim forum
filled with Christmas like decorum
I stand out like a sore thumb
out of them there's no one
who bears tattoos of their sins
as a matter of fact their visage
is prestigious and perfect
they are prefects and I'm worthless
despite this bold contrast
I'm glad for where I stand
it's an improvement upon the past
but I haven't had the last laugh...

March 17 2010

Baptized in my ways
today is a new day
the start of a new wave
a new phase
the master I obey
has drastically changed
just the same
I remain in the turning lane
these are my Psalms, 2010
some are real, some pretend
but all intend to defend
the eternal end of men
so this is how I will begin
this second epic of my pen
written in rhyme and rhythm
an exorcism of what's within
I traverse the sea of sky
with my newfound insight
coming up I continue to rise
like a high tide
the only thing more high
than a syringe or a pipe
is that celestial state of mind
it's dynomite
I'll do my best to describe
what life was like
on cloud nine

March 16 2010

the highest reach of
the highest peak
of the highest thing
in the deep blue sea
leads me to see
the gates of irony
in place of destiny
I've yearned to achieve
how can mercy supersede
the misery and grief
being grim. He who reaps
those to the dark and deep
lost in the depths
of the steps to Heaven
Angels chant in protest
and my only weapon
in my unyielding vigor
running ever quicker
the arrows only hurt sinners
meanwhile my skin is getting thicker

March 15 2010

Cheeseburgers and fries
and carnival rides
all seemingly normal sites
except for those of the afterlife
for me as the angel of death
I was a certain exception
I commoned the surface for collection
of souls to reposess
it's easy to take for granted
this hurling hunk of granite
in other terms our planet
that together we inhabit
whether bear or rabbit
whether angel or zombie
we're living moderately lavish
in this Earthly paradise
this slice of what's more high
a taste of the good life
that most let slide by
take delight in your timeline
'til you ascend or are condemned
no make pretend it's cement
from now until the end
which is when my tale begins

March 14 2010

a bittersweet victory
but another battle I'd see
those improperly deceased
from infancy or diseased
by an unseen calamity
death was like a leach
that preyed their souls to feed
now lay them to sleep in peace
in ante purgatory
my love lost loners story
is drawing near to glory
I will join the host of Holy's
as I walk through the croud
regret is like a shroud
babies open mouthed
in disgust like I'm foul
I guess its not hard to remind
them of the first time they died
there one and only vice
is there scorn for the afterlife
still I repent
I atone for my sins
among misfits and infants
the sinless

March 13 2010

So beautiful the fallen
all of them tall with
perfect width and postulate
tempted the most of all men
with the hardest of all sins
to overcome and in this
incident they didn't
the coincedence they'd spend
an eternity in a pit
of those also like minded
indulging in men and women
swimming in fluids and passion
in an orgy that's everlasting
but their kingdom is collapsing
despite this fact they're acting
like animals saving their species
in urine and feces
at that I'll stop with the details
as it's just straight creepy
not for me thanks I'm leaving
towards the surface I'm reaching
as I touch the soil ceiling
I can feel sun rays beating

March 12 2010

All I wish, my only plea
is to finish this and be free
above Hell and Purgatory
I envy those who have achieved
a scene of complacency
I can reach but never seem
to meet with sovereignty
so woe is me, falling to my knees
filled with needs I weep
my eyes turn in to see
amongst the blood I bleed
a soul still being decieved
by worldly needs and wants
envy of those who fought
and paid the cost for the top
is this really what I've bought?
so near to the Earth
I can smell the dirt
through the sweat of flirts
sluts and liars

March 11 2010

As I come to a signpost
I'm met by an angel named Hope
whose holding a ball and a rope
asking to be helped with his load
without pausing or looking back
I carry his slack, moving fast
trying not to be sidetracked
by the treasures of man
they've been designated to entrap
the weak along the path
the obscenely fat who can't
control their snapped intestinal tract
or the defiantly unashamed
money slave who in the grave
begs for change but never changes
not being racist, anyone can taste it
I pass the hated and jaded
and the overzealous in cages
as I carry Hopes chains
as I lift his weights
I feel I'm gaining strength
I feel my scars fading away
approaching a new day

March 10 2010

endurance is the key
as the ground is crumbling
beneath our feet
can we endure for eternity
running just to flee
slow, and you will need
to compete with lava tides as they recede
or burn in the sea
of misery the waves
give energy my saving grace
I'm saving face and slowing pace
as I arrive at another gate
pheremones the scent
a sinful searing stench
apprehensive of what's within
I hesitate and lose my grip
slip from the face of the cliff
grasping for any hold I can get
I can climb to the surface
or fall to the abyss
with such a choice
I gain my poise
gain the strength to hoist
myself to any level of joy

March 9 4010

Two centuries have passed
Ive grown accustomed to the fact
and the pain of my past
wih a pole attached to my abs
but the thought I can't shake
in the midst of my wake
how am I any less of a slave?
than those who I enslaved?
as I said this I turned opaque
my insides as visible as day
and the guardian of my grave
came with a pail that contained
holy water which I drank
which caused immeasurable pain
as my sins were washed away
literally sweat from my veins
"I never thought you'd change"
The angel started to say
"See things the same way
as those who you've caused pain"
my skin slowly enveloped me
and my muscles developed
though I continued to relish
in the misery I've embelished

March 8

heed the words that I speak
dont be like me
in this world is a tree
producing fruit so sweet
the juice when drinked
can change the way you think
and some may be quite keen
like the thirsty and weak
like me when I take a swig
smirk on my face
the last Id ever give
I knew when I tasted it
Id kissed the devils lips
read the book of Genesis
in it, it predicts this
tries to prevent this
but I am no victim
of any but my own prison
I knew better than to risk it
a terrible decision
believe the words bathed in hurt
Ive been trying to reverse
this curse with some cure
but nothing can be done for the unpure

March 7

continuing along the path
of those consumed by wrath
my veins spontaneously snap
and pour into a blood bath
I feel the pain of each dad
as I took a child from their hands
and the pain from each wife
as I'd take their husband by night
"Now here's where you die
Now I'm your angel of demise
oh my, oh my, how the tides
have turned once more to rise
in observance of the Christ
You must pay the sacrifice"
tripping into a pit of spikes
I feel a spear impale my side
For the first time in my life
I could understand the paradigm
like never truly realized
of wishing I could die
the scars of my sins
remind me Im condemned
for an eternity to spend
bleeding from my intestines
lamenting in torment

March 6 2010

Making progress
through the defect
a positive prospect
on the horizon
whence for my sins
I was cast to bend
wrenched to sit
the floor to kiss
my burdened lips
and in its grip
I could taste the bitterness
of those lost without consent
discontent
from incontinence
in my defense
I was Satan's guardian
who now repents
for his sins of ignorance
I felt a grimacing twinge
then I was cleansed
partially at least
cleaned of treachery
in this current effigy
have I bested me?

March 5 2010

the painful incision
of the angels transcription
burned like the conviction
of my past addiction
to cynicism and doubt
of the man in the clouds
I convinced myself somehow
I knew what life was about
but now under the combined
weight of ignorance and pride
I can hardly catch a breath
let alone to take a step
for such a wretch like I
'tis a suitable death
I look to the right and the left
and I plea for a hand
but they move on no regret
for I deserve what I get
under rain of acid and spit
prideful is in no way descript
of the way that I feel
as the downpour peels
away a layer of evil
i continue still

March 4 2010

above descent
but Im still within sin
the lowest riff
between Hell and heaven
as I tract along the path
I follow a crack
never looking back
for theres nothing to grasp
but as I walk forth
the crack leads to an iron door
with a cross on the floor
and an angel more pure
than this angel of demure
so he inscribed upon my head
the fifty steps to my success
and when every inch was red
he continued down my neck
until the names of every death
I oversaw had paid respects
down my back and arms and chest
then the angel said
"Go and do your best
to make your soul fresh
it will truly be a test"

March 3 2010

but her face
made such a change
like tidal waves
within my brain
I scraped but why
did I give the time
to a wife that already died
this woe is mine
I tried and tried
to somehow contrive
a path to align
my undermined life
If I have dealt
with the burdens of Hell
than here in the knell
Heaven's sure looking swell
though the climb may grind
your mind over time
once aligned to the Christ
a divine paradigm
will enlighten my path
enliven my dance
and liken my chance
and happiness

March 2 2010

No I've gotta go alone
I love you to the bone
but its time we went our ways
so baby please go home
cuz I've gotta go alone
I can't kiss you anymo
now I'm turning round to go
feeling like I have no soul
but its time
that we parted
to lie is a crime
truth is fate is heartless
and once weve departed
even if theres hardships
you gotta try your hardest
and I know you're the artist
at getting up
when the chips are down
made me feel like a king with a crown
thats why I stuck around
but now..
truth is answers must be found
for the good of human kind
and my head is in the clouds
so I gotta say goodbye

Download Gotta Alone mp3

March 1 2010

what was I looking for
was she truly who I adored?
though vibrant and warm
her bones had seen worn
since the river Styx shores
maggots crawled from her form
and though theyre well worn
they wove a necklace of scorn
as she biodissentigrated
such a lowly statement
I watched to my dismay
and amazement
as the love of my life
disappears before my eyes
now In a lowly state of mind
so dont overly criticize
now where do I go?
with no kind of hope?
cant return to my home
but Im a condemned soul
purgatory has taken hold
my skin shaken from the cold
looking up I want to know
what will the future bestow?